Recently, my wife, 7-year-old daughter, and I decided to enjoy the evening reading books. It was a beautiful, cool, and slightly breezy night, so we took our blanket outside and spread it out on the lawn with some refreshments.
I grabbed a book that I had wanted to finish for a while, strapped on my seatbelt as it were, and got ready for some serious, uninterrupted reading. Except there was one little problem…
My wife and daughter grabbed a book they said they were going to read together. For the next hour and a half, they were both up and down and in and out of the house. They were giggling, laughing, playing, getting anything, teasing each other. In short, they were fooling around. I doubt they read ten lines of text the whole time.
On my end, I wanted to read my book. So I found myself starting to feel a little bit aggravated. My focus was on reading, and anything that interrupted or distracted me was a nuisance and an irritant. I went so far as to say to them, “You girls aren’t getting much reading done are you?”
It was their look of confusion as if I was from outer space or some foreign place that caused me to remember that which I already knew…
Females are focused on relating. And anything that interrupts them or distracts them from their relating is a nuisance and an irritant. And therein lies the “rub.” Men are focused on the “doing” while the women are more on “connecting.”
So how do you improve your relationship with your wife?
Of course, there are many answers to this question, but about this article, the way to improve your relationship with your wife is to force yourself to set aside whatever it is that you are “doing.” Forget about “doing” anything and instead focus on the “connecting” and “relating” that she’s wanting. Realize that whatever the “doing” part is supposed to be is nothing more than a platform upon which she wants to “connect” and “relate.” But be warned, if you take time to “connect” and “relate” to and with her, she might end up “doing” you if you get my drift…
Happily, that’s exactly what happened to me.
